As we round out to the final month of this journey, which could still end fatally. The thought still always in the back of our minds. I want to reflect on one things I have learned along the way over the past 9 months. Just in case another PAL mama stumbles across my blog at … Continue reading do all the things.
30 weeks + 2 days.
An odd milestone in your mind, in my mind... We made it. This is one of the happiest moments of my life. Waking up each day this week feeling our little babe move around allowed me to walk into both my appointments this week without anxiety for the first time this whole pregnancy. I gave … Continue reading 30 weeks + 2 days.
Rowan.
I am so excited for Rowan that it usually makes my heart hurt. I am so excited that it gives me anxiety. This little voice in the back of my head calls me a fool and tells me to chill out on the excitement because you still have four months to go. I'm so excited … Continue reading Rowan.
i love you.
I don't want to compare pregnancies but with each appointment making the idea more concrete in my head it's hard not to reflect on what feels different this time around. I loved/love Benjamin. Don't ever doubt that. But with Benjamin I was more worried about myself. You can see that from my last blog post … Continue reading i love you.
your baby is the size of Bubble Tape bubble gum.
i have to start this off by acknowledging the fact that it has been 2 years now since we first began to try and start a family. i think it is important to acknowledge because people don't realize how long this journey has actually taken us and we are still not even at the end … Continue reading your baby is the size of Bubble Tape bubble gum.
some of us.
Deciding you want to have kids is weird. You either want them or you don’t. You either are in that part of your life or you’re not. Yeah sure it’s happens by what some people call an “accident” or you didn’t know it was what you wanted until it happened. There are even some people … Continue reading some of us.
I had a stillbirth.
Here comes one of the hardest things I have ever written. Two Thousand Eighteen was a nightmare of a year for us. If I had been told how hard it was going to be prior to the start I would be in disbelief. My life was content before 2018, I thought I had learned all … Continue reading I had a stillbirth.
go hug your mama or baby mama.
To say the last 5 months have been crazy is an understatement. As I dive into my 6th month of being pregnant, things are becoming more and more like a plane going through severe turbulence with moments of relief when the plane levels out and then a peace of mind shines through the clouds because the flight only … Continue reading go hug your mama or baby mama.
morning sickness or first trimester hang over.
Ok, lets just talk about morning sickness for a quick second. First of all, why the fuck are they/we even still calling it "Morning Sickness", when everywhere you read it says, "though not technically specific to the morning time". Let's be real-- the sickness lasts all day or at least for a majority of the … Continue reading morning sickness or first trimester hang over.
round two.
Whenever I get too much going on in my head, I don't feel like sharing any part of me with the world. I take a break from writing, I try not to make any plans, I stray away from my normal routine, I stop reaching out to talk to other people and I just can't … Continue reading round two.